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7 Up, 7 Down

7 Up

  1. Harlem Shake. YU’s “underground” takes over the Heights Lounge. And you thought Candlelight would be the most viral YU video of all time.
  2. YUMUN 23. Watch out real UN, Yeshiva High Schoolers are coming for you.
  3. Scaffolding @ Zysman. While Rubin dwellers and Caf attenders lose their extra 10 seconds of rain-protection, MTA boys celebrate fresh obstructions. What goes down must, well, go back up.
  4. #Seforim4Sandy. The Seforim Sale is donating $10,000 to the Young Israel of Oceanside. Does that justify the high prices?
  5. Investiture. Congratulations to Dr. Bernstein and Dr. Elman on receiving permanent chairs in the Jewish Studies department. We heard they were getting tired of standing.
  6. Sharsheret. Cake Wars. Wait, was that cake or styrofoam?
  7. Dov Lipman. The first American-born member of the Knesset in 25 years, not to mention he’s modern-Orthodox, part of a mostly centrist, secular party, oh, and watches ESPN. Sound’s like Torah U’Madda to me.

7 Down

  1. Pope and Reiss Step Down. Nobody expected the papal resignation, or, er, Rabbi Reiss’s departure.
  2. Mossad. An Israeli-Australian spy agent is “found” dead in a high security Israel. This isn’t a Daniel Silva novel, its a real life shande.
  3. Nemo. All those nemo jokes were getting a little fishy; frankly, we’re glad the snow has melted.
  4. North Korea. The pesky little country launches its fourth nuclear test. Seriously? You are starting to annoy us...
  5. Doppelganger week. Definitely one of the worst weeks of the year. If I see one more picture of Brad Pitt I swear I will spam all of you.
  6. YUConnects Site Crashes. Members high up in the administration attributed the overwhelming volume of new accounts to the shidduch crisis and, uh, to Valentine’s Day.
  7. Columbia University. Like, why does it even exist? If you want a liberal arts research university in upper Manhattan, I heard there’s this place called...City College.